I hope this journal entry touches a few souls...
This world is a very interesting, complicated, amazing place ya know? So many people around us and on the internet that inspire yet so many that are cruel. I have found that the best way to handle these opposites without ignoring or avoiding the cruel - is to embrace and eat up the incredible. As I have started my own business with Hunter, entered contests, modeled for clothing companies, worked a full time job, a side job all while trying to maintain relationships - I have often felt at times that I am doing “too much”. That I should filter out 3 things I love most and focus on that. But my soul has thought otherwise because I just keep joining, keep reading, keep saying yes and keep desiring to do MORE. As i’ve had this on my mind this week, I reflected on all of the prayers that Hunter has given to God, asking for more blessings, success and opportunities. During some of these prayers I would think to myself, “Hunter, don’t ask God for more. We are so blessed, we have enough.” I honestly had this mindset most of the time until the past few days and now it has completely changed. I’ve been humbled and I have learned what it means to be a child ofHeavenly Father. I have learned this through quiet moments of scripture study with God, through opportunities popping up right in front of my face and through listening to motivational podcasts. I have listened to one in particular a few times over the past couple of days from The Every Branch podcast. The way she describes our divine nature and our purpose on earth is incredibly touching. I want to share some of her words, write them out so they can be engraved in my mind. She talks about how God’s name is the Creator, and how we are to become like him.
“Am I allowed to desire that much and ask for that much more? Who am I to expect this level of change and this type of experience? We have to see it, say it and feel it. We are to be creators. We are not to be content with just what we have. We are to be grateful, absolutely grateful. But we are not to stop expanding our image of what we are capable of, we are not limited to ourself to desiring other things that can bless our lives and the lives of other people. We are to be creators. When we think of it in those terms it makes perfect sense to allow ourselves to dream. When we become better creators, it blesses others….we should believe that more is possible. We were not created to be small, we were created to be like God…Of course God would want this to for me. He intends to give me more, but I have to believe I can.”
Wow did this hit my soul nice a deep. This was a huge answer to my prayers. These were the questions that have been picking at my brain, the adversary telling me I can’t or that I have enough. Where really the truth is that I need to believe that God wants me to have all that I can.